这6个迹象说明你正在毒害自己的爱情！_公共英语阅读理解

这6个迹象说明你正在毒害自己的爱情！

3. You think no one can handle issues better than you.

你觉得自己无所不能目空一切

Enablers often assume that if they don’t get things done, no one will. That thought is not only a little egotistical, it’s unhealthy, said Linda Lipshutz, a marriage and family therapist in Palm Beach Gardens, Florida.“Ultimately, the belief that no one else can handle the situations as well as we can is misguided,” she said.If this is a problem for you, Lipshutz recommends ceding some control and not allowing your “ego and identity get so tied up in other’s successes or failures.”

弗罗里达棕榈滩花园的婚姻和家庭问题治疗专家认为，关系中比较强势的一方往往认为除了自己其他人都办不到。这不仅仅是有点自大，而是病态。最终，这种观念是一种误导。如果你有这种问题，那就试着放手，不要把对方的成功和失败和自己联系的太过紧密。

4. The relationship never seems to get better.

你们的关系好像没有升温过

No matter what enablers do, problems continue to crop up and reoccur in their relationships. That’s usually because the other spouse is putting in little to no effort of their own, Deverich said. “The privileged partner is allowing the enabler to absorb the difficulties in the relationship,” she said. “No amount of accommodating, soothing or solving can change anything if your partner is not changing.” `Remember: You can’t do it all. To make inroads in changing this pattern, Deverich said to give your partner an opportunity to fix problems as they come.