"It is imperative that two parties in the relationship to have a quality talk right after the first instance when they still have feelings for each other," says Huo.
“当务之急是当他们仍然对彼此有感觉的那一刻恋爱中的双方有一场高质量的谈话,”霍说。
A three-step communication method may help:
一个三步交流方法可以有帮助:
First, the two people involved should share their feelings, says Huo. "Tell your partner how shocked and heartbroken you are. If there are uncertainties about the relationship, you should tell your partner as well."
首先,两个人应该分享他们的感受,霍说。“告诉你的伴侣你是多么震惊和悲伤。如果关于恋爱有不确定,你应该告诉你的伴侣。”
Second, it is important for the abuser to talk. The victim needs to be a good listener at this point and try to pinpoint what made their partner so angry, Huo says. For example, a quarrel may start over the furniture but the girl moves to say she is very disappointed with the boy's low-paid job. And that may be the straw leading to the outburst.
第二,施虐者说话是很重要的。受害者需要是一个好的倾听者在这一点上,试图找出是什么让他们的伴侣这么生气,霍说。例如,争吵可能会从家具开始,但女孩会转而说到她对男孩低薪的工作非常失望。而且这可能是导致爆发的那根稻草。
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