冷静下来仔细思考后，你需要回访一下看见你犯错的人。问一些问题，找出自己的错误到底造成了多大伤害，比如：

"John, when I reacted negatively to your idea earlier today, I think I might have been overly harsh. I want to make certain you know that I'm not trying to be a pill and that my heart is in the right place."

“约翰，今天我对你的想法反应很消极，也许我过分了一点。我想确定你了解我不是要反对，而且我是出于好心。”

Reality checks are best delivered via email rather than in person, because email gives everyone the opportunity to cool down.

回访最好通过邮件而不是面对面进行，因为邮件给了每个人冷静的机会。

4. Apologize and address the blowback.

4. 道歉并处理后续问题。

The response that you get from your reality check in the previous step lets you gauge what you'll need to do to get beyond the mistake. For example, if the response is something like "You screwed up badly, you jerk," some groveling may be in order.

根据从他人那得到的反馈，你就可以知道自己应该如何做才能弥补。如果你得到的回应是“你搞砸了，混蛋”，也许你就该低头认错了。

On the other hand, if the response is more like "Yeah, I was offended/angry/surprised, but it's no big deal," your apology can be more perfunctory:

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