But interestingly, a lot of personal anecdotes appear from parents who say they were overshadowed by a favoured sibling, or were, indeed, their mother or father’s favourite. It seems everyone knows favouritism exists — but nobody wants to put their hand up and say they’re guilty of it themselves.
Other research, where siblings have been asked to say who their mother and father favour, suggests that mothers do tend to a show a preference for their first-born son, but fathers often dote on their youngest daughters.
Parents will often be drawn to the child who is easiest to get along with — or the child that shares similar traits to them. For example, mum will have a special bond with her sensitive, arty son, while dad lavishes attention on his sporty daughter.
Professor Scott says being least favoured in a family can colour our behaviour as adults. ‘Children who feel they are less loved within their family are more likely to develop low self-esteem, anxiety and depression.’
But some experts believe being less favoured can have positive consequences. Professor Scott agrees that favoured children can sometimes find life difficult when they have to rub along in the real world.
所有的父母都会时不时地告诉孩子一些善意的小谎言。“圣诞老人当然是从烟囱里下来了!”“把你的菠菜吃了——你会像大力水手一样强壮的。”“不,我没有把那一英镑放在你的枕头下。是牙仙干的。”诸如此类。这都是童年神奇色彩的一部分。
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