Now for the proficient partner. Dr. Kirschner says this person has the harder job─making the activity pleasurable for the other person. She suggests 'rewarding' (also known as bribing) the newbie─'just as you would a child.' So repeat after me: 'I brought along your special chips.' 'Later we can have a nice dinner at that romantic restaurant near the ski slope.' 'The boat club serves an awesome rum cocktail called The Painkiller.'

再说说已经掌握了技能的那一方伴侣。科斯切纳说，这个人身负更艰巨的任务──即让对方也能享受到活动的乐趣。她建议要“奖励”（也被称为贿赂）新手──“就像对你的孩子一样。”跟着我重复一遍：“我给你带了特别的薯片。”“一会儿我们就能在滑雪坡附近那家有情调的餐厅享受美味佳肴了。”“那家船艇俱乐部有一种特别好喝的朗姆鸡尾酒，名叫疗伤者。”

The proficient partner needs to be patient and focus on the long-term goal─which is to introduce your loved one to your pastime so that he or she will want to do it again. In other words, the hike today might not be as demanding as you would like. 'You want to have a vision of a future where you are going to have a fantastic time together and will get even closer,' Dr. Kirschner says.

熟悉活动的那一方需要有耐心，并且要专注于长期目标──那就是将爱人引入你的兴趣爱好中，让他或她以后还想再参与进来。换言之，今天的徒步旅行可能不及你想要的那样尽如人意。科斯切纳说，“对于未来，你想要的是这样一幅光景：你们俩将共享美好时光，二人的关系也更为亲密。”

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